Just a Dream
by Firefly95
Summary: Bumblebee grieves for his dead love, Jazz, and wishes more than anything that it were all just a bad dream that he would wake up from. However, Jazz isn't about to leave without him. JazzXBumblebee, rated for implied interfacing.


**This story came about because of all of the ProwlXJazz Movieverse slash where Prowl is grieving over a dead Jazz in a universe **_**where Prowl doesn't even exist.**_** I think Bumblebee would be a lot more upset about Jazz's death since they seemed to be very close, if the way Jazz is always concerned about 'Bee is anything to go by, and yes, I do ship them, if you can't already tell. ;P**

**Characters/pairings:**** Ratchet, Wheeljack, Jazz, Bumblebee, mentioned Megatron and Sam, JazzXBumblebee, **

**Warnings:**** angst, slash, past interfacing**

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own Transformers or any of its characters.**

"Blah"** is regular talk**

"_Blah"_ is thought

"**Blah"**** is com. link**

"_Blah"___**is texting**

"_**Blah"**_** is bond-link**

**--------------------------------------------------**

_Baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go?_

_  
I was countin' on forever, now I'll never know_

_  
I can't even breathe_

It's like I'm lookin' from a distance, standin' in the background

_  
Everybody's sayin', he's not comin' home now_

_  
This can't be happenin' to me, this is just a dream_

Just a Dream - Carrie Underwood.

**--------------------------------------------------**

Bumblebee lay on his berth, spark aching, as he thought of the now-dead Jazz. Of all the loving hugs, sweet kisses, and tender moments they had shared, of the passion Jazz had shown him behind closed doors, and of how it was all gone.

Never again would Bumblebee hear his cheerful laugh, feel the teasing touches, see the way his lover's optics would light up when he saw him, taste his warm mouth, or know he had someone waiting for him to come home.

He remembered the moment they'd told him of Jazz's death as freshly as thought it had just happened. They had told him that Jazz had died an honorable death, the way he had wanted to go, but it didn't sooth Bumblebee's pain, if anything, it made it worse.

Even Ironhide, Bumblebee's caretaker since he was a sparkling, had told him he should try to move on with his life. Move on? As in forget? How could he forget Jazz, the mech he loved with his entire spark? How could he forget the looks his lover gave him that told him that he wanted 'Bee? How could he forget the way it felt to touch him and be touched by him? No, he would never forget, he refused to.

A blue energon tear slid down his face and his spark clenched painfully in his chest as he remembered what Jazz had said right before the battle at Mission City, the day that Bumblebee's world would come crashing down around him.

_Flashback_

_Jazz pulled up next to 'Bee in his alt. mode._

"**Hey, Honey Bee?"**_ He asked, calling him the nickname he usually only used behind closed doors._

"**Yes Jazz?"**_ The golden Camaro inquired _

"**If anythin' happens ta'day, I just wan' ya ta know that I love you, more 'n I've ever loved anyone-"**

"**Nothing's gonna happen Jazz-"**

"**Let me finish babe, I wan' ya to know I love ya, and that when this s'all over, I wan' ta know if ya would allow me tha honor of bein' your sparkmate."**

_For a moment, Bumblebee was speechless, he had dreamed of Jazz asking him that so many times, and now it was actually happening!_

_He pressed his front bumper to Jazz's and sent out a gentle magnetic pulse and answered happily, _**"Yes Jazz! Yes, yes, yes, yes!"**

_Jazz let out a chuckle and lovingly returned the pulse…_

_End Flashback_

Of course, something did happen, Jazz, his intended, was brutally ripped in half by that piece of slag Megatron. Lucky for the Decepticon, he was dead as well, thanks to Samuel Witwicky.

His spark gave another painful clench as a different memory came to mind, it was right after Ratchet had repaired him after his…'confrontation' with Megatron, before he and Jazz had gotten together.

_Flashback_

_When he came to, the first thing he saw was a black visored, silver face looking worriedly back at him._

_"J-zzzzt," He tried to say his friend's name, but all he could get out was the first letter and a lot of static._

_Jazz placed a claw-like finger on Bumblebee's mouth and said quietly, "Ssshhhh, don't try to talk, you'll only hurt your vocalizer."_

_Bumblebee nodded and Jazz removed his finger and then rested on the other mech's hand._

_Bumblebee gazed at his best friend, then at the hand resting on his before he slowly twined their fingers together. _

_"Is he online?" The voice of the Autobot CMO caused Jazz to break optic contact with 'Bee and gently pull away before he was shoved aside by the yellow medic._

_Ratchet ran many different scans on Bumblebee and checked the repairs to make sure the young mech was recovering fine._

_"Well Bumblebee," the medic began, "You're going to be fine, except for your vocalizer, I'm afraid I couldn't do anything about it."_

_Ratchet looked sadly at the golden Autobot, who simply shrugged and smiled, as though to say, "It's okay, I'll be fine without it."_

_The medic smiled and patted 'Bee's helm before shooting a pointed look at Jazz._

_Once the medic left, Jazz sat down heavily in a chair next to Bee and retracted his visor._

_Bumblebee tilted his helm to the side in a terribly cute way of asking, "What's wrong?"_

_In a voice that was an octave lower than usual he said, "'Bee, ya almos' died ta'day," The silver mech began, "an', seein' ya so close ta…ta death made ma spark hurt, an', I realized…I need ya 'Bee." He shuttered his dark blue optics tightly to hold back tears that threatened to spill forth._

_Bumblebee soundlessly reached out and placed his hand on the side of Jazz's face and made him look at him. Jazz met Bumblebee's gaze and the younger mech suddenly leaned forward and captured the older mech's lips with his own. The chaste kiss turned into something more passionate when Jazz slid one arm around Bumblebee's back and put the other hand on the back of his helm, and pulled their bodies close._

_When the breath-taking kiss was broken, Jazz gazed down at 'Bee and said, "Bumblebee, I-I love ya…I think I always have…it jus' took ya almos' dyin' for me to realize it…"_

_Bumblebee smiled sweetly and placed his hand over his spark, then placed it over Jazz's to say that he loved him too._

_Jazz then crawled up next to him on the medical berth, careful to avoid his healing repairs._

_End Flashback_

More energon tears slid down his face and he let out a hiccup, wishing that he and Jazz had already bonded so that he could have gone with him.

Bumblebee shuttered his optics as another wave of raw anguish washed over him.

"Honey Bee…" a voice whispered

Bumblebee snapped open his optics and looked around his room for the source of the voice.

"W-who is it? Show yourself!" He cried out

An achingly familiar chuckle sounded right next to his audio, "Come on babe, I think ya know who I am." It said

Bumblebee hugged himself and shook his head, "Nonononono, it can't be, I'm hearing things."

A caress ghosted across one of his doorwings and he had the impression that this, whatever it was, was also stroking one of his antennae.

Bumblebee let out a cry and pulled away from the spirit, frightened.

"Ssshhhh baby, I promise, 's really me." it said and Bumblebee could barely see the faint outline of his lover.

He hesitantly reached out toward Jazz's face and recoiled in shock when his fingers actually brushed him.

Tears gathered in Bumblebee's optics as he whispered, "But…How? I saw you…you…die…"

Jazz smiled softly and crawled into his lover's lap, "Do you 'member what I asked ya 'fore the battle began?" he asked hopefully, fingering the latches that held 'Bee's chestplate on.

Bumblebee shivered from his touch and whispered, "Yes, you asked me to be your sparkmate."

Jazz smiled and slid a finger under the yellow chestplate, teasing sensitive wires "Well, somehow, that lil'bit of unfinished business bound me ta this world." He said

Bumblebee slid his hand up Jazz's thigh, resting it on the spirit's hip, "But how can we bond? You're…not real."

Jazz chuckled and shook his helm, "Oh, Honey Bee, I'm real, jus', not…completely tangible." He said, phasing his hand through 'Bee's arm to make a point, "That don't mean we can't bond though." He said slyly reaching for the latches on his lover's chestplate.

Bumblebee grabbed the hands before they could reach him, "Jazz, no," he shook his helm sadly

Jazz gazed in confusion up at his lover, "I thought you wanted this…" he whispered

'Bee's arctic blue gaze was full of pain, "I do, more than you'll ever know, but…I don't want it for one night, I want it for the rest of my life." He broke optic contact with his silver lover and continued, "I don't want to wake up in the morning wondering if it was just a dream, wondering if I miss you so badly that my meta made this up…"

Jazz suddenly leaned up and kissed Bumblebee slowly, savoring the sweet flavor that was his golden lover.

"Then let me at least stay wit' ya ta'night." The silver mech said softly, caressing Bumblebee's thigh.

Bumblebee nodded and lay back on his berth, pulling the spirit with him. Jazz spooned against him and the golden Autobot wrapped his arms around his slimmer lover and buried his face in the crook of the spirit's neck.

"I love you Jazz." He whispered

The other mech smiled and whispered back, "I love you too Honey Bee, forever and for always."

**--------------------------------------------------**

Before Bumblebee woke up the next morning, Jazz left, he had wanted to stay so badly, to see his beautiful golden lover's optics online, and kiss him good morning, but he knew that if he did that, Bumblebee would beg him to stay, and…He'd never been able to deny the younger mech anything.

He phased out of Bumblebee's grip and floated up, whispering as he went, "I will find a way to come back to you, Bumblebee, I promise…"

**--------------------------------------------------**

When Bumblebee onlined, it was to near frantic banging on his door, groggily, he rolled off his berth, noting with a pang of sadness that Jazz was, in fact, gone, and walked sluggishly to the door of his quarters.

He entered the code to unlock it and Wheeljack stumbled into his quarters, "Bumblebee!" The white mech exclaimed excitedly, "We've found a way to bring Jazz back!"

**--------------------------------------------------**

End

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**Whew, finally finished! This bad boy took me hours! ^^;**

**BTW, incase you don't get the ending, they're talking about using the Smallspark.**

**Oh and please, Please, PLEASE review!**


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